Strong Dick/Dude Hybrids (Tube Dudes)

In general, we understand that the term Dick again conjures up Men, and certainly that is not the whole truth. A more reasonable and equitable term might be Tube, as “tube” refers to the generally shared form of any gender’s genitalia and further refers to the creative power endemic in any human.

A Tube Dude is a dude bent on rewriting the rules towards its own ends, and it works with the template for “power” that has been largely stamped by Dicks. Tube Dudes share with Dicks a strong will to make an imprint upon the world around them. Tube Dudes are not uncommon in the Dude community, and they use a range of Dick techniques. Often a goal or main component of the Tube Dude project is some physical structure or location - the fostering of a Dude Empire.

The Dude Empire is most skillfully (and dudishly) manifest in a physical space fostered in the promotion of the chosen endeavor. This space should be open to the public in some fashion, so that there is a range of benefit within the community - basically people can participate in the field/work and/or receive the benefit of the work. There is not a whole lot of profit happening here; the concern is either cultural or social. Success is rather measured in quality of productions and/or popularity of the effort. The Empire is gotten through the Tube Dude we call Emperor, who is a single person more or less owning or controlling the space. The Empire is probably not the sole source of income for the Emperor. (An Empire can also be gotten by a group of motivated dudes, see Dude Values.)

Emperor - This Dude is a master (sometimes hopeful master?) in her dude field; includes the ownership or control of a physical space (Empire) fostered in the promotion of the chosen field/work. She is out in public - people generally know who this Dude is, and she is in contact with many people regarding the state and functions of the Empire. However, the Emperor may not be accessible in the way of your average Dude, therefore there is less shooting of shit and unscheduled hanging out.

Some Dudes affect aspirations toward an Empire, but if it is intended to exist for more explicitly personal gain, it cannot be regarded a Dude Empire. In this scenario, the Dude (or perhaps team of Busy Married Dudes) is not Emperor but Employer, inasmuch as this type of large scale project involves his Dude Network, using friendly Dudes as the necessary manpower. A participating “employee” Dude’s Dudosity is totally indulged by this loose style of Employment (not too demanding, writes his own hours, decent wage with no taxes, little perks like lunch and coffee etc, and basically a hang-out style atmosphere) and the long-term benefit of having invested, upwardly mobile friends (should they choose to remain Dudes).

Often a real Tube project needs the manpower of willing helpers to be successful. A motivated, large scale project foisted by a Tube Dude on her Dude Economy or general society can go either way on the Dick-Dude spectrum, depending on the extent to which she is allegiant to Dude Values. A measure of the relative Dudosity of any Tube project can be gleaned from observing: how much is “fairness” towards helpers employed in the endeavor (for this is a value often glaringly absent in Profit Motive)? Other assessments could be made through observations of Fun, Gratitude, &c. We mention this not to be judgmental of Dude Efforts but as a useful, cautionary tale. If you are a Dude or considering a Dude lifestyle, you may be enlisted in the service of a Tube’s project, and it is good to know what to look out for!

Motivated Hipster
The “Motivated Hipster”11 is a more productive version of the Dabbler, actually promoting and elevating the development of its projects. The Motivated Hipster succeeds in achieving relative cultural power through ruthless pursuit, most notably engaging others towards its end without returning the favor.

MONGER
The Monger (aka, The Professional) is active and networks within her field, but is primarily involved with the creation of a product, often creative and unique. The creative product is not a group effort, because the primary motive is economic profit. The Monger is oddly comfortable with marketing to fellow Dudes; this may be explained by a family to support or house payments. Mongers began as Dudes (and may or may not care to preserve that strong association), and are thus able to use insider dude consumer information to their benefit, targeting and increasing large audiences through various uses of the Dude Network. (see Productive Dudes, Internet)

The BULLSHIT ACTIVIST
Not to be confused with the Holier-Than-Thou (see Dude’s Dudes), this dude/dick has unlimited compassion for their cause (Socialism, Veganism, etc) countered by very limited compassion for partners, families, or other dudes. This theoretical compassion (rarely tested) masks essentially straight up dick or monster behavior.